A man carries a lot of weight on his shoulders. Job stress, financial stress, family concerns, trying to stay healthy, and his own sense of personal responsibility all contribute to a heavy load. In order to successfully manage the load and be the father, husband, son, employee, and man he needs to be requires balance. If you’ve ever lifted weights, you know what I mean. The heavier the weight you’re trying to lift, the more important is your balance.
Balance is achieved through a solid base. Think of a house. The more piers the house rests upon, the more stable the house. So it is for a man. But his piers are not made of stone or brick. No, a man’s balance, his ability to bear his load, is provided by his parents, his wife, his children, his teachers, his friends, his colleagues, and his own sense of self worth. Some piers are bigger than others, providing more balance and stability, while others are smaller but still important. Some of us are blessed with more piers than others from the start. I certainly fall into that category. When a pier is lost from the foundation, stability is lost; the loss of balance makes the load harder to carry. The other piers absorb more of the load, and with time, balance is restored. The more piers, the quicker this takes place.
A few weeks ago, I lost one of my central piers when my dad passed away. He had always been there, and now he’s not. I admit I have come close to collapse a couple of times. There have been some very hard days since he’s been gone. Sometimes the grief still comes out of nowhere like a rogue wave out of the darkness, but thankfully it’s happening less and less as time goes by. I’m lucky I have great family and friends who are helping me regain my balance. I’m lucky I’ve always had such stability in my life. I feel bad for those who have never known how it feels to have such a solid foundation. I know I’ll eventually be okay. My family and I are leaning on each other, so we’ll all regain our balance. There are still lots of piers in my foundation, including the tools given to me by my dad. I still miss him. Every single day. I always will.